A Lesson From The Woman With the Green Hair

We are taught a lot about diversity in this age. The world has become a gigantic melting pot. Each day we encounter people of different cultures, languages, practices and beliefs. Corporate training and seminars, classroom subjects, and customer service training are venues where diversity is discussed. We are taught to respect the cultural environments, practices, and beliefs of those whose origin is different from ours. We are encouraged to embrace their right to be who they are without opposition. These types of training are profitable on some level, but will never bring about the understanding that we need to embrace others who we see as different from ourselves. After all, isn’t it human nature to criticize that which it does not understand? Is their a better way to teach us to embrace the right of others to embrace themselves? I believe so. Allow me to explain.

I was out shopping one day, minding my business, or so I thought, when I saw a woman with green hair enter a business. I did not recognize her, but to make her more personable, we’ll refer to her as “Susan.” I wish I could tell you that I didn’t give it a second thought and continued to mind my business, but that’s not what happened. Something inside of me stood up tall and proud, as I thought to myself, “Why would she want to have green hair?” Almost immediately I heard, “Because its her hair.”

God takes every opportunity to teach us. This was my teachable moment.; Focusing on differences can breed fear and judgment. Instead of focusing on differences, lets talk about our similarities. My hair is red (Yes, I color it). Doesn’t Susan have the right to do the same? Is red better than green? We are all similar in the fact that we have the right to be who we want to be. We are similar in that we need food, water, and air to remain alive. We are all similar in the fact that we all want to be loved and accepted. We all suffer losses of some kind. We have times of laughter and tears. In our secret places we feel fear. doubt and insecurities about ourselves. Our similarities run deep..

A play on words can change it all. Instead of using the word different, let’s welcome the word unique. I like that word! Unique suggests value. It denotes rarity. Isn’t this the way were created?

Stay Spicy!

The Big Top

The Big Top

If you insist on living your life as a circus act, your audience will always be waiting with popcorn, peanuts and soda, waiting to see you perform. Be sure you disappoint them. Make the decision today to retire your act.

Live your life for you. Trying to please others is like putting on a blind fold and walking behind an elephant. Your vision is blocked and at the end of the day, the only thing you have done is walk in elephant poop (I could say something else)!

What Kind of Friend Am I?

What Kind of Friend Am I?

During one of my restless nights, I was thinking about friendships. I began to think about all the things that I read on social media, and all the things that I hear others, and even myself, speak about friendships. Many say, “Don’t call everyone your friend. Others say, “You think people are your friends and they stab you in the back.” Some people say, “I don’t have friends, I have acquaintances.” Even still there are those who talk about fair weather friends. People are quick to declare that others hate on them, while pretending to wear the “friend” title, but will never admit that they are guilty of the same.

It's ok

It's ok

“All you have ever had was me. No one ever showed you real love. So, you placed your everything in me without ever taking the time to see what I wanted for you. I want to give you life. But you have always been so afraid that if you moved ahead in life, our relationship would not be the same. You were afraid that moving into greatness would make you prideful. Understand this; our relationship does not depend on you, but it depends on me keeping you. Don’t be afraid to live life.

Realigning Myself

Realigning Myself

Hello everyone!  It’s been a while. So many things have happened since I last shared. As you may recall, I shared the 7 pillars of Virtuosity. The first pillar, Self-evaluation, revealed the instances that will cause us to look at where we are in life and compare it with where we want to be. It challenges who we are and who we want to be. We talked about life experiences that would warrant a period of self-evaluation. Do you remember when I wrote that one of those life experiences was loss/death? Well, little did I know that I would be blindsided by such a loss.  A few months ago, my second eldest son, Bobby, unexpectantly transitioned from this life to his heavenly home. Nothing could have prepared me for the confusion, pain, and devastation that my heart would face as I doubted myself as a parent and a Christian. 

Losing Me, Finding Me

I am taking a detour to talk about my new book, “Losing Me, Finding Me.”  This book was birthed out of a very dark place in my life during which I was involved in a very toxic relationship. It started out as something wonderful. There were hours of talking on the phone, texts, weekend visits, laughter, and good times. However, it wasn’t long before I began to feel as though something was wrong. There was no physical or sexual abuse. It was mental and emotional abuse.  Each time I tried to voice my concerns, I was assured that everything was ok between us. The dysfunction was very subtle, and I tried to dismiss it.

7 Pillars of Virtuosity: Alignment

7 Pillars of Virtuosity:  Alignment

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything regarding the 7 Pillars of Virtuosity. Hopefully, you have spent this time evaulating some things in your life. This has certainly been the case with me. I’ve spent much time evaluating certain behaviors, looking at situations that needed to be changed, relationships that I needed to embrace, and those that I needed to reject. Allow me to be transparent for a moment;

Life

Life is a gift. It's an adventure to be lived with those that we love and cherish. Life is also like a vapor; one day your hand is wrapped around your sweetheart's hand in high school, and before you know it, your hand may be wrapped around a cane. Let us live each day in laughter and love, being committed to ourselves first. Let us love freely and not apologize for it. May we possess enough mercy to pray for those that do not love us back, and enough strength to love them in spite of. For these reasons, we are here; To live. To laugh. To love. We are His workmanship, and He is the joy of our salvation. While we exist in these earthly temples, let us believe until the end, that we are more than conquerors in Christ Jesus. Life is like a garment that we don each day. Wear it well.  

7 Pillars of Virtuosity: Self-Evaluation

7 Pillars of Virtuosity: Self-Evaluation

Self-evaluation takes place when we ask ourselves the difficult questions such as, “How did I end  up here? What do I really want to see happen in my life?  What do I want to accomplish? Why didn’t I do that when I had the chance?  Is it too late for me? You may or may not have all the answers now. However, self-evaluation causes you to look deep inside of yourself. That's the place where the answers lie.

A Lesson From Ice Cream

A Lesson From Ice Cream

I am not very adventurous when it comes to ice cream. The Rocky Roads, the Cookies and Creams, and the Mint Chocolate Chips, do not arouse my palates curiosity at all. There are so many flavors other than chocolate and vanilla.  One would have to agree that in the world of this smooth, creamy, and seductive pleasure, everything is not black and white.

The same applies to life. Many things that come our way can’t be explained. Things that leave us bewildered; The loss of a job or a financial emergency, a death, a breakup, or a negative health diagnosis  are just a few of the situations that may wreak havoc in our lives. The reasons that lead up to these life changing events can be more devastating than the event itself.

An Acquired Taste

An Acquired Taste

One day my 27-year-old son called me and very excitedly shouted into the phone, “Mommy, (yes, he calls me Mommy) guess what? I like broccoli!” Now you would have to know KeyAndre’ to understand the significance of what I am saying. When he was a young boy, I had that hardest time trying to convince him to eat vegetables. I tried bribing him and telling him about the vitamins and minerals that he needed to help him grow up to be big and strong.  My last attempt was holding him hostage at the dinner table, while trying to convince him to eat one kernel of corn before he could eat his favorite ice cream. Yes, I was desperate!  Now he had the nerve to inform me that after all my years of begging, pleading, and threatening, he had now acquired a taste for that which he once hated.

An Apple a Day

An Apple a Day

I was in the supermarket buying apples, when I accidently allowed one to drop to the floor. Being the conscientious person that I am, I did not want to place it back in the bin with the rest of the apples, so I nestled it in with the others that I was going to purchase. After all, I had examined it carefully and I did not see any damage. Upon returning home, I washed the apples and placed them in the fruit bowl. There was no way to tell which apple had dropped. They were all so beautiful.

About Seasoned and Flavorsome

Seasoned and flavorsome is the blog-child of Virtuosity. It has been created to assure the mature woman that her time is not up and that her presence in this world is necessary.  This blog will discuss issues designed to uplift, encourage, celebrate, and build  in order that the essence of her virtue can be released. It reminds her that she emanates an aroma and a flavor into her universe that aligns her with goodness, wisdom, and life.  It is a reminder that we need not lose our flavor because of the circumstances that we have faced, nor those yet to be encountered.

The key to becoming seasoned and flavorsome is embarking on a journey of establishing emotional well-being and stability. You, and only you, possess the power and the authority to surround yourself with love, peace, joy, kindness, wisdom, positivity and the like. Spice up your life with these virtues and they will provide a guiding light for you as you continue your life’s journey.

As you continue to network with this blog, remember that your Creator has given you permission to arise, shine, and be a light in this dark world. He has equipped you with gifts and talents that are uniquely yours.

You are truly Seasoned and Flavorsome.

Stay Spicy!

 

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Why Virtuosity

A virtuoso  ....

is defined as one who excels in the technique of an art; A person who has great skill at some endeavor. I learned that I myself am a work of art, but the life that I was living was not the original work. I was broken and wounded, and had lived with my wounds for so long, they became a natural part of who I was. when failure, disappointments and crises manifested, I blamed myself instead of the wounds. It wasn’t until much later in my life that I realized that I didn’t love myself.

Over the years, I subconsciously engaged in patterns of self-destructive behaviors, which in turn caused me to blame myself even more. I accomplished much, but I remained wounded by the shame, neglect, and rejection of my past, which was a result of the physical/sexual/emotional abuse that I endured earlier in my life. As I stated, I had accomplished much, but I knew there was much more to life than what I was experiencing. How to attain it, I did not know. Each time I tried to move into my purpose, I allowed my past to pull me back into places of comfortability; That place of ordinary and average paralyzed me. As I became older, I reasoned that I should be proud of what I had accomplished and be happy.

But God! 

He opened my eyes to a brand-new day and a brand new me. Suddenly age did not matter to me. I realized that there was so much life ahead of me; so much to accomplish; so many things yet to be experienced; so many places to go. Through His Love and Grace, I did the work. I faced the pain, determined to walk in my liberty. As each layer was removed, I ascended to another level of freedom.

My Healer was at work; a beautiful work of art being revealed. I can think of no greater masterpiece than myself. I am the artist; my life is my canvas. Guided by His Love for me, I choose my own colors and the depth of my strokes. I am painting my future and I like what I see.

Here I am; an entrepreneur, speaker, writer and author. I have written my first book (coming soon). I am living my best days now and there is much more to come. To answer the question, I chose Virtuosity because the word is synonymous with brilliance, excellence, expertise, intelligence, and prowess; this is me. This is you.

This is my message: No matter what has happened in your past, you can begin again. Create your own masterpiece and, “live your best days now.”

Virtuosity….”Mastering the Art of Becoming You.”